The Story of Dave Lizewski and Mindy McCready
by martin4x4
Summary: She tries to live a normal life, he tries to be a superhero. Neither path is easy.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own rights to Kick-Ass and/or anything related to it.

Story picks up at the 2nd movie, the night after Mindy's visit. I read the comics, but as this fanfiction will progress I plan to derail quite a lot and quite quickly, picking up bits and pieces from the original story here and there.

First chapter may start at slower pace, as I need to connect "my story" and the original one in some sort.

Note: 1 meter should be slightly above 3 feet, 2,5 centimeters should be around 1 inch.

**WARNING** - at one point in the battle there will be quite violent scene.

* * *

This was... strange. Mindy just dropped by in the middle of night. It was new for me, seeing her hurt by such ordinary stuff. I have seen her cry only once, when her dad died and even that was only after she finished her job. Perhaps she means it that she just wants a normal life, I just find it hard to believe.

"Look Dave," said Todd as he slapped me on the shoulder from behind and pointed at Mindy. I was already in the school cafeteria with Marty, eating our lunch.

"She looks different," added Todd as he sat down next to us.

"Sorry about yesterday," said Marty, but Todd just waived his hand to let it be and stared at Mindy. I kept looking for her, but I couldn't see her from my seat. A crowd formed in between us. It was strange as I heard people laughing at Brook. Shortly after Mindy came from the crowd, wearing a proud, wide smile across her face.

"Boys."

"Mindy," we said at the same time. She leaned over my shoulder and put something in my pocket.

"Keep this for me for awhile, will you," she whispered in my ear and then looked over the cafeteria. Some teachers were coming towards us.

"What happened?" I asked.

"I followed your advice," she winked at me, then teacher took her by arm and led her away. She kept her smile on, though.

As students were passing by, we stopped one them and found out what had just happened. Everyone was leaving the cafeteria and when the smell reached us, so did we. I hid that thing in my gym shoes, nobody would look there. It was a good idea, as later I was taken to the principal's office and asked if I know anything about that incident. Our principal was seen mostly only during major events, else she was always in her office. Her office was at the ground floor, hidden behind the school's secretary office. She seemed ok. Neither too strict, nor too benevolent, just doing her job. When I came in her office, Mindy was sent to the secretary and when she passed by me, she gave me this devious smile. Principal told me they were looking for some "phone", but they did't find anything. I repeated I don't know anything, so she sighed and sent me away.

"That was sick Mindy, I love it!" Todd was telling Mindy how great it was as she waited for me in front of the secretary's office.

"Shut up Todd, you don't need to cause more troubles," Marty hissed at him.

"You know each another?" I asked them, but they just met. Todd kept asking so many questions and sending compliments at Mindy, even while she answered almost none of them.

They really couldn't do anything to her. Three girls vomitted in cafeteria and there was no way she could be called responsible for it. Nobody saw anything extraordinary. Those three were called liars for making such obvious lies. Then we had to split, as we all had different classes to attend. Nothing spectacular happened for the rest of the day in school.

When I came home, I found dad in my room. He found my costume and gave me his speech, how he considers it reckless, irresponsible of me and ordered me to stop. Of course I said no. I said few words which I could have spared him, took that costume with batons from his hands and went out of the house. What else could I do, give up on everything great that was going on in my life? To change who I am? I just put the costume on at the nearest corner and went for JF HQ to crash at that place.

As I reached the entrance, I can see lock missing at the front door. It is strange as we never use them, we always enter by elevator. As I went trough them, I could hear noises. The closer I got the clearer they were. Someone was interrogating Colonel and another voice was shouting at Eisenhower to shut up. They were telling him what they will do if Colonel does not tell them what they want to hear. I stopped to look around. I took one smoke grenade, fired it up and threw it in there. It took around 5 to 10 seconds to create fog so dense that I couldn't see one meter ahead of me. I bent down as low as I could, as it was a little easier to see closer to the ground. As I went in, I almost stumbled across someone's legs. I did not recognize them, so I hit their owner in a knee, sending him to the ground with a lot of noise. When he fell, I hit him right in the head with second baton, right in the temple. Eisenhower was right next to us, locked in a cage. I calmed him a bit, opened the cage and said "Where is your master?" He looked at me for a second and then went straight in the fog. Soon I heard loud screams as he torn his victim apart. After this someone opened fire from an automatic weapon.

"You dickhead, you hit me!" Screamed Chris from the other side of room. "Sorry boss," shooter answered two meters behind me. I turned around and saw him approaching at about the same time as he spot me. I swung my baton so the longer end was bellow my hand and hit him it in guts. He drops on his knees and before he could aim at me again, I hit him in head. He went with the hit, so I got ready for next one, but he fell on a corner of shelf, cracking his skull wide open.

Next what I heard were at least two pairs of feet running up the stairs. Noises calmed down and I heard only Colonel as he said: "Good boy, bite the rope, yes you are a good boy." I got closer to him, as fog went few centimeters up.

"How many were here?" I asked him and stayed ready for combat.

"Five, how many you took out?"

"Two plus one by Eisenhower."

"Good, that should be it, the rest ran up stairs to the street. Close the door before smoke attracts fire-brigade."

I did as he said. Nice column of smoke was escaping out and only then I noticed how awful air was down there. The smoke smelled from sulfur and I had tears all over my face. When I forced myself to go back, colonel threw a gas mask at me, but it took some time to clear air inside it. It is nice to have air filter when you already have gas trapped under your mask.

"What will we do with the bodies?"

"Don't worry Kick Ass, I can take care of unwanted bodies," said Colonel with laughs and coughs.

"Was it Chris, the guy who got shot?

"Maybe. He was with them."

"Always nice to hear from old friends," I whispered to myself.

As I found out, aside from being beaten up like punching bag and dislocated shoulder, Colonel was fine. What caught my attention was Eisenhower. His fur went from dark brown to pure red and blood was everywhere. The body he attacked had torn out its throat, face skinned to meat, muscles cut out from its arms. I don't know what they did to him before I came, but that smoke must have been last drop. If it hurt my nose so bad, he with much more sensitive one must have suffered quite bad, I hope I didn't ruin his smell receptors.

"Thanks for coming by, by the way," said colonel as he opened a window, to let some smoke out.

"I wanted to crash at this place for a night, but someone came sooner." The second part I didn't say so loud. He heard me anyway.

"Forget about Chris, if he is shot it will give us some time. He also lost most of his friends," said Colonel as he kicked the body that hurt Eisenhower. I couldn't see his face, but from the way he said it, I can imagine his grin. Prey came to hunter and hunter killed the prey.

"Not that I don't want you in here, especially after tonight, but I doubt it is safe or healthy to stay here till the morning," said Colonel.

I nodded and went straight to Marty.

* * *

A/N:

Once upon a time, martin4x4 played airsoft. We had these awesome ex-military smoke grenades (RDG 2, if I remember correctly). If thrown into 10x30m (30x100 feet?) enclosed warehouse, it really took around 5-10 seconds to create such dense fog you could not see under your feet. And the smell... it was a pain to operate in it, as you were breathing faster, i.e. inhaling even more of it. We had plenty of other interesting equipment, some may find its way into this fanfiction.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed it and that grammar was not that painful that it discouraged you from reading. Leave a comment, all are appreciated.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N:

I am conducting one experiment. If you'll notice, leave a comment about what you think of it. If you won't notice, then there is no harm done. If it turns out as a disaster, please tell me as soon as possible, so I can revert it and spare time and lives of future readers.

* * *

So I told Marty what had happened. He still can't believe it. We were supposed to be the heroes, to hunt bad guys, not be struck at our HQ. Especially after their boss was out of action. He is pissed that Hit Girl went out of radar and wonders where she could be hiding. If only he knew he spoke with her just yesterday. He wonders if Battle Guy should also retire, but then he decides to keep training while staying out of action for some time. What is worse is that he realizes they were after me.

"Don't get me wrong Dave, I will stand behind you if needed, I am just not willing to take unnecessary risks by walking down the streets as Battle Guy."

"I understand, it's reasonable. But we still should keep ourselves in good shape."

"Oh don't worry, gym is already my second home."

It is truly visible. He has this bigger posture, but I 'm starting to believe he has just thick bones. The results of intensive exercises are that he kept his wide shoulders, only now he can knock someone out without much effort. Todd is the exact opposite. He is thin no matter how much he tries to gain mass. If he exercises a lot, he becomes wiry.

I crash at Marty's floor. He gives me some pillow and some blanket, which I use as a mattress. Damn Chris, I could have been on quite comfy couch right now. I just wonder how did he find out about HQ. And even more importantly, it won't be safe to meet there anymore. As far as morale is concerned, I am worried about decrease in numbers if something won't boost it up. Or someone, perhaps. Yeah, I will speak to Mindy again.

Guess how was I awakened next morning. By nice kick in the face. I get out of chaos in HQ without single bruise, only with cough and now I get a black eye. As it turned out, Marty likes morning shower and he forgot I was on the floor. I slept in some spare shirt he gave me, so in morning I just got into yesterday's clothes and sprayed some deodorant all over me. Not my finest moment.

School is boring as usual with few stress moments. I can go talk to Mindy during short breaks, but I decided to wait until lunch break. In the meantime I have to explain how I got my black eye to every single person who walks by. It is so annoying, that I start to give each person a new fake story. Luckily before I run out of ideas they give up as nobody expects to hear the truth.

"Why did you ran here?" Marty asks.

"Yes man, you look all nervous," Todd joins in.

"I am just waiting-" I don't even finish that sentence. I leave our table as I spot Mindy and go straight towards her.

Mindy goes in cafeteria later after crowd settles down. I always rush in there as I hate standing in a line. Only other option to avoid standing in the line is if you come as last, which Mindy does. I neither like the idea of delaying lunch when it is unnecessary, especially it if would mean that I have less time to eat. If there is no other option, I skip the line, as all older students do from time to time. But if you do it too often, complaints stack up and you get into troubles with teachers.

"We need to talk," I say and gently touch her arm, while pointing to unoccupied table. She sighs, but complies.

"Is it about the same thing?"

"Maybe. Have you heard?"

"No, but I can see," she smirks and points to my black eye.

"No, that was just Marty walking over my face." She laughs, but I don't give her time to mock me about it. I tell her the whole story, but she is not that impressed. I must admit that she is right, I didn't do anything special, all was thanks to that smoke. No special moves or anything. At least she gave me that it was a clever move.

"I said I can't, how many times until you give it up?"

"There are some things I can't give up, you should know it."

"Shut up already, you did fine on your own anyway." I just shake my head in dissent and move my chair, so I can get back to guys.

"Where do you think you are going? Sit or I will kick your ass. You dragged me here."

I can't help myself but to laugh about it. So I tell her that this is why I like her so much. She blushes a little, kicks me in my chair and throws an apple at me, which she got with lunch. I catch it before it hits my healthy eye and bite into in. Yeah, she would like to see me with two black eyes. We chat for a while and she tells me in a bit more detail what happened with that pink mafia. Mindy turned to drastic measures, but I doubt she will ever have be bothered again. After lunch we head back to our classrooms.

"So, you and Mindy, are you working on it?" Marty asks with smirk on his face.

"No! What? Why you always ask that."

"Because you did work it out, didn't you?

"No and drop it already."

"So she is open for business?" Todd asks in the most inappropriate manner. Like always.

"No, you... forget it." I just give up on him and turn away.

"What? He said he is not working on it," Todd objects, but Marty just shakes his head and also gives up on Todd. Todd keeps asking about Mindy and I keep refusing to give an answer. That is pretty much how we spend the rest of the day. Colonel asked for emergency meeting at evening, but before that I have to deal with other stuff.

Dad is't home when I come, so I have some time to prepare what to say. When he arrives, I let him rest for awhile. I stop by living room where he sits, watching TV. I haven't felt this desire to avoid speaking with him since mom died. Don't get me wrong, I love my dad and I am sure so does he love me, but I was never able to open to my parents. And to top it off, this trait I inherited from dad. The result were a long quiet months after she died. I don't want it to happen again, so I bite my tongue and go ahead.

Surprisingly, it went better than expected. He is far from being happy about it, but he understands he can't stop me from being who am I. I promise him to be as careful as possible and this is pretty much all we say. In past my parents used to push me in one or another direction, hoping to secure a better life for me. When mom died, dad turned more towards himself. That is understandable, considering how many years they were happily together. I had my leash let loose for some time and I never returned back. Perhaps becoming Kick Ass was its final stage. If Mindy didn't rescue me back at Rasul's, I wouldn't be here, telling this story. Even if I escaped from that, it would be only a question of time. She teached me since we brought down D'Amico family as often as she could. She was so angry at me sometimes. My condition was just an average to say the best and my skills were almost non existent. I still can't understand how can she throw all that away and look forward to a normal life.

After clearing things out with dad I go to that meeting. It is set at an old, abandoned dock. It is a simple structure with ground floor that has two garage doors, large enough for two bigger trucks, basement, from basement is access to empty dock and above ground floor is small room. Colonel plans to put some beds at top, he wants to leave ground floor as garage, as there can be easily parked up to four cars and basement wants to split into three rooms, one for training, one for meetings and one to be left as storage room. There are no plans what to do with dock, as nobody has any boat nor anybody plans to obtain one. All sounds nice and Colonel's optimism helps improve the mood among those who came. Aside from Colonel and me, we have here Marty, Night Bitch, Doctor Gravity and Todd. Todd may not be the most useful addition, but we know him for a long time, he wanted to come and our lines are already stretched thin. Marty tells us that Battle Guy will come to meetings but that we shouldn't count with him on next few raids, at least until things calm down.

Colonel gives us quick debriefing after last event and gives us short briefing on next operations. He wants to seek out where Chris is by taking down his followers, slowly stepping up the ladder, each step closer to him. Nobody is against this plan, and I doubt there is anything else to do. While we can be targets there is no possibility to pursue petty crimes anyway. After meeting is dismissed, me and Marty go to Colonel to discuss if he has already found our next target. Doctor joins us, while Todd goes for Night Bitch. It always has to be some woman. Not that we are dating or anything and he doesn't know I hooked up with her. I can hardly blame him for it. But I blame him for not being more interested in our operations after he babbled about how much it would mean to him, how he could help, how many ideas he has. He always has so much to say and does so little afterwards.

About hour later, JF is dismisses. Colonel drove us in the city and all went home, except Todd. He has to escort Night Bitch. What if something happens, of course. I bet he hopes that something happens. Something specific.

* * *

A/N:

When I was going the secondary grammar school, one of my friend always asked (literal translation) "Did you solve it?" after I spoke to any girl he did't know. It annoyed me so much and they used it so often that still, years after that phrase still comes up from time to time. When I used "Are you working on it?" in the story, I was referring to this particular issue. May come up in future chapters, so just so you'll know.


	3. Chapter 3

I can't stop thinking about how famous would be the video of Kick Ass kicking Ass Kicker's ass. I know, he does't know about me and that Bitch, but still it pisses me off. When I come home, I go through window. I don't even know why as I can simply use back door. Not like dad doesn't know what I do. I am just too mad to think about such trivial stuff. And to top it off, some moron flashed me with country beams just few minutes ago, so as blind as I still am I almost fall of this stupid roof. I throw my costume on the ground. Dad knows about me, so he won't be surprised if he finds it. I usually take shower after being out in it, but I am not in the mood right now, what is the point. Tomorrow is Saturday anyway, I'll take it in the morning. It's not like I was fighting anyone. Heck, I was driven here, just two blocks away from my house. My only chance to have sex tonight was already doing it, except without me. So I will stink in my own bed. Who cares. I just turn around and let myself fall on my bed just in my underwear.

"Watch it you moron!" screams Mindy and throws me on the floor with one kick to the stomach. Nothing like being beaten and thrown on a floor. In your own room.

"What the fuck Mindy!" I curse as I try to pick up myself.

"What an idiot jumps on a bed when someone is sleeping in there," curses Mindy and rubs her belly and head. It must have been quite pleasant to be awaken that way. Nah, she deserves it.

"The one who owns it," I say and sit next to her. "That will be one nasty bruise in the morning."

"No it won't. Else I'll kick your ass. I could have killed you if you didn't went sumo on me," she says and punches me in arm few times.

"Lucky me," I smirk on her and throw her on the pillow, laying on her and holding her hands up, so she can no longer hit me.

"I am serious, I sleep with a knife." And there goes the mood. I move back a little, after being frightened by image of Mindy, stabbing me right in the hearth.

"Don't piss all over yourself, you big baby. You could have kissed me. Maybe I wouldn't even stab you." She still lays down and plays with pillows.

"Maybe? Anyway, why are you even in here? And how come my dad let you sleep here?"

"You don't want me in here?" She sits up, leans in and whispers in my ear. Turns me on a little.

"I never said that. I was just curious." I answer her and try to calm down. Dad walking in on me in flagrante after previous fight is the last thing I want.

"I knocked, nobody responded, so I went in by a window. You was jerking somewhere out so I fell asleep. There you go Mr. Inspector. Am I arrested?"

"I was at the meeting." I answered before I noticed her. She offers her wrists and gives me a teasing look. Her hair is all messed up and I can't stop looking in her eyes. She is so hot right now. Maybe she's giving me a signal, maybe she just plays with me, but I can't resist the temptation to try and kiss her. I Put my hand on her cheek, move it under her chin, she closes her eyes and slightly opens her lips. I take it as a go and kiss her. She savors every bit of it and gives no resistance, so I kiss her again and again, putting myself into it, slowly laying her on the bed. Then she moves her hands on my chest and pushes me away. She doesn't seem mad, but she has this curious, judgmental look.

"With that whore?" I take a second to comprehend what she means, which she understands as "yes". She sits up. Now her mood is dead.

"No, I mean yes, she was there, but she left with Todd." I finally remember what were we talking about one minute ago.

"Todd? That skinny dude? You should step up your game. First you date a whore and then some skeleton steals it from you," she sticks her tongue out. I could have saved it from there, but it would be too easy. I would have to think first, but the blood was not in my head.

"Come on, like if your dates are perfect." I regret it as soon as I say it.

"Fuck you, Dave." She throws me off the bed and goes right out of the window.

"Mindy!" I scream after her, but it's no use.

Then some neighbor screams at me things like "shut up you psycho." I can't even see where she went. She is so good at this. Staying out of sight

I write her a message that I am sorry, what else can I do. I can't run after her and I can't go to her home. Perfect day must have a perfect ending. I just lay back on the bad and think about what an idiot I am.

* * *

A/N:

This chapter came as natural to me as if it was my real me.


End file.
